Life, Light and Lincoln

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project

Let us at all times remember that all Americans are brothers of a common country, and should dwell in the bonds of fraternal feeling. Abraham Lincoln

Life and Lincoln

Kitch and I have been spending a good of our time producing our documentary Walking Into The Light at Gettysburg. It has been a demanding and delightful experienced.

It forced us to immerse ourselves in the history of the Civil War, and it opened our eyes to the brilliance and compassion of Abraham Lincoln.

While he was President, he was vilified by his detractors.

Nevertheless, he remained true to his beliefs.

Early one morning while I was doing research for the documentary, I found an insightful comment about President Lincoln. It was written by T.V. Smith:

This Lincoln, whom so many living friends and foes alike deemed foolish, hid his bitterness in laughter; fed his sympathy on solitude; and met recurring disaster with whimsicality to muffle the murmur of a bleeding heart. Out of the tragic sense of life he pitied where others blamed; bowed his own shoulders with the woes of the weak; endured humanely his little day of chance power; and won through death what life disdains to bestow upon such simple souls—lasting peace and everlasting glory.

When pressed for an answer to the question, “What is America at its best?” Smith’s description of Abraham Lincoln comes to mind.

The man who saved the union and lost his life doing it was caring, compassionate, and thoughtful. He saw public office as an opportunity to serve others, not himself. He did not complain, and he never walked away from his responsibilities. He wanted America to be a country deeply rooted in belonging, community and confraternity.

For kitch and me, Abraham Lincoln is the personification of America at its very best.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Sometimes Opportunity Is Only A Friend Away
Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project

"Fellow-Citizens, we cannot escape history." Abraham Lincoln

Reliving October 28, 1960

Bill Kashatus is a teacher, a writer and a friend.

He loves history, and he shares that love with everyone he meets.

He works diligently to organize an annual conference that helps students, teachers and guests better understand the history of our area. This year the conference focused on presidential campaigns. It was cosponsored by the Luzerne County Historical Society and Luzerne County Community College.

Dr. Thomas Baldino, professor of Political Science at Wilkes University, presented an interesting paper on the evolution of voting patterns in Northeastern PA. He identified six key or transitional presidential elections and he carefully explained how the political complexion of our section of the Commonwealth has changed over the years.

Tony Brooks, the Executive Director of the Luzerne County Historical Society, took his listeners on a journey from the very first presidential election to the 2008 election. Using a well-organized PowerPoint Presentation, he brought the candidates and the election results to life.

Dr. Kashatus opened the afternoon session with an informative and thoughtful analysis of President Theodore Roosevelt and his many trips to our little corner of the world.

One of his slides caught my attention. It was designed to explain “TR’s” thoughts on religion. It read:

“To do justly, to show mercy, and to walk humbly before the Lord thy God.”

After I read the slide, I thought to myself, in 14 words, President Roosevelt said it all.

My moment came at 2 p.m., when I was given an opportunity to discuss our documentary JFK: One Day in October. Kitch and I produced this documentary without a budget in 2003 as a special edition of our What Is America? series. It was our attempt to explain the way JFK’s visit to Wilkes-Barre and Scranton on October 28, 1960, impacted 18-year-old kids like me. To be very honest, it was one of the more difficult assignments of my life, because that visit had a profound impact on my life.

Whatever anyone might think of John of Kennedy and his Presidency, one thing is certain, it made young people believe that a life in public service could be a life well spent. He made many World War II babies believe that we could make a difference, and he presented a face of America to the world that was admired around the world.

Throughout the presentation, I was thinking about my son who is in a very difficult place at the moment. I was thinking about my parents and the sacrifices they made for their children so we could have a better life. In return we felt an obligation to honor their sacrifices by making something of ourselves.

I was thinking about one of my classmates, Pat Mulloy, who became the Assistant Secretary of Commerce of the United States, and a well respected member of the Foreign Service. He is one of the 16 people who was featured in our documentary.

I was thinking about the accomplishments and the distinguished service of my high school debate partner Peter Smith, a hometown boy, who 52 years after Kennedy’s visit is a US attorney determined to root out corruption wherever he finds it in Northeastern Pennsylvania.

In my opinion, the first steps toward the noble accomplishments of Pat Mulloy and Pete Smith were taken that autumn afternoon on Public Square in Wilkes-Barre, PA, eight days before John F. Kennedy was elected President of the United States, and 100 years after his predecessor, Abraham Lincoln, won the presidency.

During the session, my eyes were drawn to a diminutive woman dressed in traditional Muslim attire. I invited her and her friend to stay for the session so I could introduce them to JFK the candidate, JFK the motivator, JFK the inspiration for thousands of young people who spent a lifetime “waiting for the snow” just like Thomas Scanlon who was one of the first young Americans to serve overseas in President Kennedys’ Peace Corps.

Tom Scanlon was a Peace Corps volunteer in Chile from 1961 to 1963. He coined the phrase waiting for the snow to describe his willingness to endure hardship to serve people in need.  

While speaking to a group of Peace Corps recruits, President Kennedy complimented Tom Scanlon, and he shared his story and his phase “waiting for the snow” to encourage Pease Corps volunteers to go out of their way to help people in need.

Tom Scanlon was director of the Public Welfare Fund for 34 years. During his tenure, its assets rose from $20 million to over $600 million.

He founded Benchmarks a unique consulting company dedicated to serving countries with innovative social development programs.

In 1996, Mr. Scanlon published a book entitled Waiting For The Snow.

Tom Scanlon’s hometown, Scranton, PA, was the final stop during JFK’s October 28, Visit. Without question, Tom Scanlon’s life reflects the light of an extraordinary Face of America on its very best day.

Before the conference ended, the students I asked to stay told me they were glad they did. They liked the message and the challenge of JFK.

At this conference, I saw past, present and future faces of America at its best. I experienced America thinking, learning, sharing, growing and coming together in community.

The teachers were filled with a wonderful spirit of giving. The students were interested, impressive and very interesting. They wanted to better understand what presidential politics is all about. More important was their desire to figure out what their role was in this vital process.

In a moment of absolute brilliance, one of the students, Michael Feeney, responded to a question from a speaker with these words:

“I don’t think I can give you an answer. I am just learning and forming my opinion.”

I saw the qualities of a teacher written all over Michael’s heart and soul, and when I got the opportunity, I was quick to tell him to consider teaching as a career.

Bill Kashatus and Tony Brooks are doing their best to preserve our history. They know that Abraham Lincoln was right, “We can’t escape history.”

In my opinion, Bill Kashatus and Tony brooks are examples of America at its best.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Gone Too Soon

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

The memory of your dear Father, instead of an agony, will yet be
a sad sweet feeling in your heart, of a purer and holier sort than
you have known before. Abraham Lincoln

Gone Too Soon

I only knew him for a short time, and I did not know him well. Nevertheless, during the board meetings we attended at the Back Mountain Memorial Library, the person I watched and listened to taught me well.

He was dedicated, determined and devoted to his work.

He was competent and comprehensive about his assignments.

He measured his words, and he never spoke in a hurtful way.

He was candid, genuine, humorous and very affirming.

He was a responsible man who always wanted to do his best.

He extended himself to open the door for others.

With all that said, I saw in his eyes and felt from his heart a kind of pain and worry that made life difficult for him and those he loved.

In July, he sent me a beautiful note filled with words of affirmation and encouragement. It came from the goodness of his heart. It was intended to help people connect, and make people feel the warmth of community. There was, however, a sense of urgency. It was as if he knew his time was limited.

We never had the meeting he suggested. He was hospitalized. His seat in the boardroom was empty. His voice was silent.

The news of his death confirmed the words of Thomas Merton, “Death is something you see very clearly with eyes in the center of your heart.”

Dick Evans was a college graduate, an Air Force veteran, a devoted husband and parent, a successful businessman and a community leader. He personified the characteristics of millions of Americans born in the shadow of World War II: determination, persistence, resilience, a desire to serve and a deeply felt obligation to honor and respect parents, family, community and country.

Dick Evans will be missed by his family, his friends and his colleagues on the Back Mountain Memorial Library Board.

He was a man with presence, a man with passion and a man with ideas.

He was a Face of America on its best day.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Patterns of Behavior

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

Once people become pattern aware, it is virtually impossible to revert to old, self-serving behavior. Sylvia Lafair

Patterns

For the past three months, I have been producing America at Its Best commentaries for Marty Wolff’s Business Builders Show. It’s a wonderful opportunity to learn about people who are doing things to help entrepreneurs and small businesses.

Our commentary this week focused on the work Sylvia Lafair is doing to improve workplace productivity. It is included here because it provides another insight into America at its best?

When I think about America at its best, I think about change, growth and transformation.

When I listen to Sylvia Lafair talk about life and leadership in corporate America, I hear the caring, creative and thoughtful voice of an expert who has done her best to help people reach their best.

Her message is compelling, genuine and interesting:

1. We are what we see, hear and do in our childhood;

2. We react to stressful situations at work with patterns of behavior we learned in our family;

3. Often times these patterns produce negative results and diminish trust;

4. These patterns can be changed with observation, understanding and transformation;

5. The Drama Queen or King can become a storyteller. The Avoider can become a resolver of conflict. The Overachiever can become an affirmer.

Essentially, it’s all about helping, empowering and serving the best interest of the other person, and that makes good things happen for the company or business.

Dr. Sylvia LaFair is many things, an accomplished businesswoman, an award winning author, and a respected therapist, all significant accomplishments to be sure.

Far more important, however, is her message of belonging, change, community, hope, and redemption, because that is the message of America at its best.

You can listen to other commentaries by clicking on the America At Its Best page on the home page of our website.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Emily Perez at 29, September 12, 2012

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

We are not permitted to choose the frame of our destiny. But what we put into it is ours.  Dag Hammerskjold

September 12, 2012

In about two hours the sun will rise on America. Alarm clocks will ring, mothers and fathers will get children up and ready for school.

On street corners all over our country, students will gather to catch the big yellow bus that will take them to the place they will call home for about eight hours.

Red and blue-lined roads will be jammed with traffic as parents make their way to the office or factory or department store.

On the buses and in the cars, radios will provide a serenade of sounds that will greet this day with joy.

That’s the way it will be on this morning of opportunity in America, but in one community in Maryland, it will be very different.

I doubt that the pickup truck carrying this father to work will have any music blaring. I think the same will be the case in his wife’s car. I am almost positive the mood in both vehicles will be sad, poignant and questioning. The faces of the drivers will reflect the emptiness and pain of the loss of a child. Their hearts will be beating in harmony with the significance of this day.

For most of us it is September 12, the day after our national expression of grief for the 2900 Americans who lost their lives on the day the earth stood still for America.  Today is a new day in America and the routine of life resumes for most of us but not all.

For Vicki and Daniel Perez the mourning continues, because this is the day their precious Emily lost her life in Iraq six years ago.

2nd LT Emily Perez

By every measure, 2nd LT Emily Perez reflects the light of America on its best day.  She was a leader in her class at West Point. She was a leader with the uncommon blessings of courage, determination, focus, kindness and a natural born instinct for selfless service to others.
Everyone who knew her talks about her radiant smile, her competitive nature, her willingness to do the right thing regardless of the consequences. She was small in stature, but a giant in all the things that matter.

I’ve been told, she was not ordered to Iraq. She volunteered to switch her assignment so a friend could be with her fiancé. She did not have to lead the convoy on the day of her death. She volunteered because she did not believe her recently arrived replacement was ready for the assignment.

Emily’s big brain and bigger heart would have enabled her to go to any college of her choosing in America.  Her athletic ability would have been celebrated with scholarship assistance.  She decided to make West Point her home for four years. She was a member of the 9/11 class, and that had meaning for this indefatigable teenager who wanted to serve her country just like her father had done in Germany where she was born.

To know Emily was to admire Emily. Kitch and I did not have that privilege, but we did have a priceless moment with Emily while she was a cadet at West Point.  It is included at the end of a short video about her legacy.  You will find it at this address:

http://faceofamericawps.com/video/emilys-legacy/

On this September 12, Kitch and I will be thinking about Emily and her parents.  We will give thanks for the gift of her example and their friendship. We will celebrate her wonderful life and many accomplishments, and we will pray that the work of her parents to share Emily’s message through their Emily’s Way Foundation will be blessed with success.

America needs the light of Emily Perez. American youngsters need the example of Emily Perez, and Americans of all ages need to be reminded that the heartbeat of Emily Perez and many like her is the heartbeat of America on its best day.

She never gave up on her dream.

She never gave in to the people who made life difficult for her.

She never turned away from people who needed her help.

She always put the needs of her country and the people she was leading before her own needs.

She always looked up for inspiration, and looked out to inspire others.

She wasn’t rich, and she isn’t famous. She was, however, simpley the best America has to offer.

The day Joanne Chabalko introduced us to 2nd LT Emily Perez was one of the best days of our life, and until the end we will continue to sing her praises and spread her message because, in our opinion, she is the Face of America on its best day, and all of us, young and old, can benefit from her example.

Thank you Vicki and Daniel for giving our country the priceless gift of Emily.

Thank you for working long and hard hours to mentor young women in Emily’s Way.

Thank you for the dignified and inspirational way you have carried on despite the grief and sadness of your loss.

Thank you for your quiet acts of kindness that exemplify your beautiful faces of America on its best day. All of us who know you are in your debt.

2nd LT Emily Perez did not choose the frame of her destiny, but what she put into it clearly speaks to America at its very best.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Shanksville, PA: A Place Where Hope Is Stronger Than Death

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

Our worth is always determined by our deeds, not by our good intentions, however noble. Og Mandino

An Anniversary Like No Other

When Kitch and I made our first visit to Shanksville, our lives were changed forever.

The genuineness of the People’s Memorial to the Heroes of Flight 93, the welcoming way of the ambassadors we met, the natural beauty of the setting, the poignant reminders of the courage and determination of the passengers and crew of Flight 93 and the heartfelt tributes left by thousands of visitors made an indelible mark on our souls.

This week I opened the door to my memory room.  Once inside, I spent a good deal of time thinking about what I learned during our visits to the People’s Memorial and the annual screenings of our Changed Forever series in Shanksville. Thousands of images flashed through my mind. The rush of emotions accompanying this kaleidoscope was humbling.

These are some of the images that spoke to my heart.

Memorable Quotes

The seven words written on a guard rail, “The peace you find here is eternal,” reminded me that most of the things we think are important don’t give us peace of mind.

The handcrafted note from a child named Shelly, “Thank you for what you did even though you were scared.”  Embedded in these words is the powerful and healing virtue of gratitude. As one of the ancients said, “It is the queen of all virtues.”

The inscription on a tile that read, “A hero is one who keeps trying.” In this world of bigness, most of us feel a sense of overwhelming smallness, yet the child who wrote this note reminds us that perseverance and perspective will help us make it through the distractions and the nights of darkness into the light of understanding.   

The seven words written on the wall of tributes in 2002 by one of our students Chuck Moran: “A piece of us all stays here.”

Those words set the tone for all of our visits that followed.

Another member of our group, Jeff Soles wrote this note: “One nation under God indivisible thanks.”

Jeff Soles was one of the most impressive and courageous people I have ever met. He was battling cancer when he visited the site. He lost his battle shortly after he wrote this note.  His words had special meaning then, and even more meaning today.

Images of Horror and Hope

The black mushroom cloud hovering over the red barn in Val McClatchy’s picture is the classic image of what happened in Shanksville on September 11, 2001.

In another respect, that black cloud is symbolic of the darkness of animosity, hatred and violence that darkens our world to this day.
Val has paid a very heavy price personally and professionally because of her picture. Yet she remained true to her mission. She wanted to share it with the world no matter what her critics said. Today Val’s picture is one of the icons of that place and that day.

For 10 years, the 40 Angels of Freedom watched over the huge debris field as they paid a personal and poignant tribute to the men and women who fought the first battle in the war against terror. These slate angels created by Eric Pierson and his wife Tammy gave the site a quality of comfort and warmth that is difficult to describe.

Chuck Wagner’s captivating picture of the site at sunset may very well be one of the most beautiful pictures of the symbolism of this sacred place.

Chuck is a thoughtful man.  In his world, faith and family set the agenda. He and his wife Jayne have spent countless hours working at the site as Flight 93 Ambassadors.  Chuck has taken more pictures of the site than anyone I know. This picture records the beauty and majesty of this place of hope and heroes.  

This picture of the MacMillans entering the site records a special moment in the life of a family whose friendship and love for Todd Beamer and his family brought them here to celebrate his life. It speaks to the joy of community. It represents friendship, loyalty and love. For Kitch and me all of these things are embedded deep in the soil in Shanksville.

Everything about the People’s Memorial told visitors they were not alone.  They were a part of the Shanksville family, and, in another respect, they were an essential part of the American family.

Joanne Galvin presenting the National 9/11 flag to the students
from North Plainfield High School is a bridge to the next generation of Shanksville storytellers. It is a powerful reminder that we must never forget what happened to our country on September 11, 2001. It represents the fulfillment of a promise Joanne made to her late husband to continue his mission, and the hope that the next generation will keep this important national symbol flying in every state.

Kitch’s impressionistic picture of the shadows cast by the tributes on the chain link fence records the haunting feeling one gets while visiting the site. There are so many questions, and very few answers.  Why did it happen?  Why were so many innocent lives taken in New York, Washington, DC and here without cause? Why do people hate and kill in the name of God? When will we learn to resolve our differences without murdering innocents?

Questions and Answers

In 2009, Clarence Michael looked at the wall of tributes, and
he asked the quintessential question, “I wonder what I would have done?”  In my heart of hearts, I believe that most of the people who visited the site silently asked themselves this question. They know what they would have liked to do, but few are certain about what they would have done.

Chelsea Blue was a freshman at the North Plainfield High School in New Jersey when she defined heroism with these thoughtful words:

“A hero is someone who does great things and you look up to them, and you try to follow in their footsteps. A hero is not a celebrity. A hero is someone who stands up for what’s right, does what’s right, and never breaks the law or does anything bad. You never know your heroes until they are gone.”

Our chance meeting with the cheerleaders from North
PlainfieldHigh School in New Jersey in 2009 opened the door to opportunities for teaching, learning, growing and service we never thought possible. Shanksville was our second home during the past ten years. North Plainfield has become our new second home. We are deeply grateful for the friends we have made in both communities.

The Gift of Friendship

This picture of Janie Kiehl telling the Shanksville story to a group of students from our last class evokes warm and sentimental feelings of gratitude for the gift of friendship.

Janie Kiehl was the first person Kitch met in Shanksville. We did not know it then, but she would become the person who made all of our screenings happen.

On the day we literally bumped into one another, Janie was the Flight 93 Ambassador on duty at the site. Today, Janie is an admired and cherished friend. Every year she arranged the community dinner for our guests, and she secured the Methodist church for our screening. In more ways than I can describe here, she personifies what friendship is all about.

During our last interview, I asked Janie what she would want people to know about Shanksville. She thought for a moment, and then she replied, “Welcome to small town America.”

Today the People’s Memorial is only a memory of a time when citizens of goodwill joined together to remember and pay tribute to 40 heroes and heroines who defined in courageous and heroic ways what America is on its best and worst day. The design came from their hearts, their beliefs and their experiences.  The construction was the work of their hands. The atmosphere reflected their caring hearts.

The temporary memorial was open, honest, welcoming and oh, so memorable. For those of us who experienced its transformational power, it will live in our hearts forever, and it will give us hope.

As one youngster wrote, “Hope is stronger than death.”

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Good News, August 4, 2012

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
Mussari-Loftus Associates
All Rights Reserved
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

You have to make your own happiness.  Maeve Binchy

“Vitamin N”

For the past few weeks, Kitch and I have been working long and hard hours in our garden. It is not the kind of work I thought we would be doing at this stage of our life. It is, however, the kind of work we love to do.  The garden at sunrise is peaceful and quiet. While we work we listen to a magnificent concert performed by cardinals, mourning doves and robins.

We are building enclave gardens to make the garden more maintenance free and more attractive to visitors. We are also repairing damage from two years of horrible weather, and neglect because of the unexpected challenges life gives all of us.  As of today, we have finished 10 new enclave gardens. They speak to family, life, love, excellence and service

Working in the dirt is a challenging, humbling and enriching experience. The benefits are many. 

According to Richard Louv, a growing body of research links more time spent in a garden and other natural settings with reduced stress and depression.  Mr. Louv refers to a 2008 study at the University of Michigan to make an important point; just one hour of interaction with nature results in improved memory and attention span. He cites another study completed at the University of Kansas. It documents a 50 percent boost in creativity for people who were steeped in nature for a few days.

In his book, The Nature Principle: Reconnecting with Life in a Virtual Age, Louv encourages parents and grandparents to get children connected with nature. That’s exactly what we do with our grandchildren during their Windsor Park Camp experiences.  

Last week, our six-year-old grandson joined us for his first Windsor Park Camp experience. During the day, we spent time in the garden, and every night we ended the day in the garden. When I asked him what his favorite camp experiences were, he put his time in the garden at the top of the list.  When I asked him why, his answer was quick and to the point, “It is peaceful there.”

Need I say more?

Opportunity: America at Its Best

Opportunity is the life blood of America. Our ancestors came here because they believed America would provide them with opportunities to make life better for themselves and their children.

Opportunity is central to the promise of American life, and my life, even in its Indian summer, is an example of the blessings of opportunity.

Recently, our friend, Marty Wolff opened the door of opportunity for us. Every week, Marty hosts the Business Builders Show.  The program is designed to inform, educate and encourage entrepreneurs and small business owners. Marty thought it would be a good idea to end each program with a commentary.  He invited us to join his team

Kitch and I discussed the offer. We accepted, and we came up with a concept and a title.

On July 21, and August 4, we broadcast our first and second America at Its Best Commentaries. You can listen to these short summaries at this address on our Face of America website:

http://faceofamericawps.com/commentaries-america-at-its-best/

You can listen to Marty’s show on Saturday morning at 8 a.m. at 94.3FM "The Talker" or you can listen live on your computer at www.943thetalker.com 

Rebroadcasts of the shows are available at Marty’s website:

www.businessbuildersglobal.com

Beautiful Thoughts for Difficult Times

The news of the day at the local and national level has been very discouraging of late. I don’t have to recite the litany of stories originating from the darker side of our world. You know what they are. Rather than wasting time lamenting, we decided to build a page on our website called Beautiful Thoughts. Every week we will add a beautiful thought.  It will focus on positive experiences, kindness, and generosity of spirit that come from caring and helping hearts.

It is not by accident that our first Beautiful Thought is about our greatest American president and his philosophy of leadership. Our second beautiful thought is about something we all need, laughter.

You can listen to Beautiful Thoughts for Difficult Times at this address:  

http://faceofamericawps.com/beautiful-thoughts/

Walking into the Light

Four months ago, Kitch and I spent three days working with 10 students from North Plainfield High School at the Gettysburg National Military Park.  It was an incredible experience for the students, and the fulfillment of a lifetime dream to produce a documentary about Gettysburg.

Kitch and I love the majesty, solemnity and silence of the battlefield. We appreciate what the battle says about America on its best and worst days. We admire the people who have spent a lifetime working to restore the battlefield.  We have been impressed by the kindness of people in the National Park Service and the Gettysburg Foundation.

In 2010 during our journey across America, Kitch and I were very fortunate to meet and become friends with Barbara Platt. We spent several enjoyable visits with Barbara in Gettysburg, and we recorded two priceless interviews with her before she lost her battle with cancer.

Every time Kitch and I visit Gettysburg we learn something about courage, integrity, patriotism and service to country.

Every day since our production experience there, we have been working on some aspect of the documentary. It may very well be one of the biggest research projects of our career as  documentary filmmakers.  We have no budget. We rely on the good will, help and support of a team of volunteers headed by our dear friend Tom Mazur. We have connected with some wonderful people in Gettysburg who have offered their help and encouragement. Bonnie and Frank Orlando head that list.  

As of today, the assembly edit of the introduction for Walking into the Light at Gettysburg is finished. We have a long way to go, but we feel confident we can meet all of the objectives we set for the project and the documentary.

If everything goes as planned, there will be two screening events, one this year, the other in 2013.

We will keep you posted on our progress.

A Very Special Moment

This week, we had one of those moments that cannot be accurately described. It must be experienced.

It came in the form of a note we received from a student who visited our garden with the students from North Plainfield in July.

With gratitude for the opportunities we have had to work with the students in North Plainfield, Kitch and I built an enclave garden to celebrate what is one of the most diverse high schools in New Jersey. Walking the halls of North Plainfield High School, visiting classes, and attending extracurricular events, we found the face of America’s tomorrow today.

We asked our friend Michael Sackett to engrave a cornerstone rock and four smaller rocks for this enclave garden. When the students arrived we asked them to place the rocks in their enclave garden. Then we invited the students to have lunch.  There were a few requirements.  They had to turn off all digital devices when they entered our home.  They had to sit together at two large tables in our dining room.  There would be no adults in the room, and they were encouraged to make the most of this opportunity to talk with one another face to face.

After lunch and before the students left our home, I took a few minutes to speak from my heart about the most current research about the impact of digital addiction. I did not know how my comments would be received, but I felt compelled to share them, in an honest, empathic and engaging way.

The letters Kitch and I have received from several of the students have been very encouraging. The latest note touched our hearts in a very special way:

Throughout the whole trip … I hadn’t really talked to the other girls much but as we sat at the table I had no other choice but to talk to them and I found out that I actually have a lot in common with those girls so thank you for making us sit together. 
I would like to let you know that I liked the talk you gave us after lunch it got me thinking about how I do spend a lot of time texting instead of actually talking to people and about how I do need to take time everyday to just sit and talk to them in an area where there’s no distractions and my resolution is to do just that. 

My favorite part about the visit over your house was the gardens I love your gardens.  It was like in every area of the gardens was something new to be discovered and while I walked through them I felt really peaceful, I wish that I would have had more time in the gardens but I’m hoping that next year I will be able to visit them.  I can’t wait to go back and see what else I can learn from your visits.

P.S I love the rocks you got for us, and I would like to let you know that I took a picture of the big rock and is now my profile picture on Facebook for the time being.  

More than anything, the candor and sincerity of this note and the others we received documents an important point. There is a place in the lives of young people for mentors.  If we approach them in a positive way, we can get them to think about the things that worry us, and we must find a way to do just that.

Update on the Mourning Dove

We received a number of beautiful notes from people who read our story about the Mourning Dove. To everyone who took the time to write we say thank you.

As of today the nest is empty, and there is but one reminder of what happened there.  In this picture, you can see the empty nest and the grey colored feather that obviously belonged to one of the squabs.

Nature is both beautiful and mysterious.

A Final Thought

Maeve Binchy, one of Ireland’s national treasures, died this week.  

Before she became a celebrated author, Maeve Binchy visited our hometown with a group of Irish teachers.  People who met her said she was down to earth and very witty. Like many of her American fans, Kitch enjoyed all of her books, and she agrees with Gail Rebuck’s description of the woman who identified herself as an airport author.  “She was a woman who wrote from the heart with an unrivalled warmth and passion.”

Part of her legacy rests on the success of the 16 books she wrote. More than 40 million people were amused, entertained and informed by the characters in her books. Much more important and lasting to the people who knew her was her kind and welcoming disposition.  

Roy Greenslade chose these words to summarize the life of Maeve Binchy. “There was a total absence of malice in Maeve. She loved people and, in return, they loved her. For her, life was all about laughter.” (picture of Maeve Binchy by Jon Kay Wikimedia Commons)

These three quotations speak to the genuineness of Maeve Binchy’s heart of gold:

“You don’t wear all your jewellery at once. You’re much more believable if you talk in your own voice.”

“There are no makeovers in my books. The ugly duckling does not become a beautiful swan. She becomes a confident duck able to take charge of her own life and problems.”

“The great thing about getting older is that you become more mellow. Things aren’t as black and white and you become much more tolerant. You can see the good in things much more easily, rather than getting enraged as you used to do when you were young.”

Maeve Binchy made her own happiness in life. By doing what she loved to do, she brought happiness to millions of people all over the world. Now that’s a beautiful thought for every day.

Until the next time, we hope that all of your stories have happy endings.

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Thinking About Life on a Day of Death

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

Death is something you see very clearly with eyes in the center of your heart.Thomas Merton

July 20, 2012, is a day Americans will remember; not for its beauty, not for its poetry, not for its opportunity. It’s a day we will remember for its emptiness, its horror, its viciousness and its senseless death. It’s the day Aurora, Colorado, became a part of the lexicon of mass murder.

In our hometown, we know something about mass murder. On September 25, 1982, a 40-year-old prison guard killed 13 people, including five of his children. Kitch knows that story like the back of her hand.  She covered virtually every aspect of the story.

In my mind’s eye, the only difference between the tragedy in Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania and Aurora, Colorado, is 30 years and a growing list mass murders that produce heartache and heartbreak in ways no one can accurately express.

One of the worst things about experiencing a day like this is the feeling of helplessness. You see the carnage. You sense the incredible pain. You want to help. You want to stop the hurt and the madness, but you are nothing more than a stunned spectator with good intentions. A mixture of curiosity and fear attracts one to the story. A feeling of disbelief,  disgust and numbness makes one look for a place to find peace and comfort.

The words of Edvard Munch apply:

You know my picture, ‘The Scream?’ I was stretched to the limit—nature was screaming in my blood…

Changing the Conversation

I would like to begin this day after the carnage with something positive and uplifting for people who have been following our Face of America adventure. I would like to change the conversation to something more beautiful and joyful.

While America was expressing its outrage and trying to deal with the depravity of the Dark Knight of Aurora, Colorado, a miracle of nature was happening right before our eyes in the entrance to our garden.

In early July, a Mourning Dove took up residence in a trumpet vine covering a banister on one of the staircases in Windsor Park. Kitch and I have had the good fortune to watch this miracle of life unfold from the building to the crude nest to the laying of the first egg, then the second and the inspirational nurturing that has followed.

Several times a day we visit the location in a quiet, non-threatening and respectful way to get a glimpse of the nest and the dutiful dove that is always there. We come with curiosity and concern. We leave with a sense of awe. On Wednesday, 36 hours before the dark clouds covered our country with grief, we introduced 10 students from North Plainfield, New Jersey, to the miracle in our garden. The accompanying picture records this joyful moment.

A little research helped us to fill in the blanks and better understand the process.

Those who study these birds tell us “there is no more gentle and pleasant bird than the Mourning Dove. They are a social bird that enjoys being close to humans as long as they are soft spoken and do not get too close.”

Doves symbolize peace, goodwill and friendship. They are monogamous. When we see a dove in the garden at a birdfeeder or birdbath, we know that its mate will always be close by.

We did not know that both parents incubate and care for their squabs, and they both produce milk for their babies.

The female dove builds the nest.  The male dove provides the materials. Alison McColllum gave her readers a wonderful description of the nest:

“A bird’s nest is a complex construction if ever there was one. Depending on the species, they can be extremely elaborate like the condolike nest that Quaker parrots build on power line poles or a basic structure like made in a tree by Mourning doves. They work with what they have and respect the world around them. The nests are environmentally responsible and over time disappear. They live with the land instead of on it as we humans tend too. Also they are able to leave behind the nest and explore the world without having to stay with their possessions. They are free and able to rebuild when tragedy strikes.”

Doves are responsible parents.  During the two week incubation period, the male works the early shift from morning to afternoon.  The female takes her place on the eggs for the remainder of the day and at night. The two weeks after birth the mother and father will feed the squabs a diet of pigeon’s milk for three days, then they will adds seeds. After fledging takes place, the father will continue his watch and support for two weeks.

If all goes according to nature’s plan, our little corner of the world will have two more Mourning Doves to enhance the sights and sounds the garden.  This will happen at the same time the case of the Dark Knight of Aurora is make its way through the Colorado court system. We will be watching both of these scenes; one with horror, and disgust, the other with admiration and enjoyment.

Maybe that’s the way life is supposed to be. When things are difficult, and everything seems to be in doubt, we look to nature, its beauty, its elegance, its majesty to give us hope that tomorrow will be better than today.

You can be sure of one thing. While we are being restored in our garden, we will be offering living prayers for comfort, healing and rejuvenation for the victims, family members and friends who are hurting in Aurora. They will need the peace, good will and friendship of an army of Mourning Doves to put their lives back in order.

Of this they can be sure, they will receive this and much more from people all over America who want to ease their pain.

To rearrange the words of Bernard Beckett; Living is defined by dying, and the death and destruction we experienced on July 20 is not the America we want for ourselves, our children or our grandchildren. We can and we must find a way to bring the spirit of the Mourning Dove to every corner of our world.

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tony.mussari@gmail.com

Happy Birthday America: Part 1, Good Neighbors

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

The genius of the United States is not best or most in its executives or legislatures, nor in its ambassadors or authors or college presidents, or churches, or parlors, nor even in its newspapers or inventors, but always most in its common people.Sinclair Lewis

When I think about the heart and soul of America, I think about the people Kitch and I meet at the ground level as we continue our search for examples of the Face of America on its best day. These people are not rich or famous.  They are not influential or powerful. Their names do not appear in the headlines and they do not make the evening news. Their stories do not go viral on You Tube.

These Americans are happy being who they are, doing what they do. They are grateful for the opportunities they have.  The core of their lives and their beliefs is deeply rooted in service to others. They are good neighbors, loyal friends, and decent human beings.

Good Neighbors

Close to home, they are people like Bob Type and Theresa Evans.  Bob is a Vietnam veteran. He retired this year from a blue collar job. Bob is quiet and unassuming by nature.  He is a person who willingly helps his neighbors. After the autumn storm downed trees in our neighborhood, Bob picked up his pole saw, and he used it to help his neighbors cut down storm damaged trees. Kitch ad I were beneficiaries of Bob’s kindness.

When Theresa Evans was five years old, she spent five months living in a crowded boxcar of a train operated by the Nazis. Once a day the train stopped and she and others were permitted to get out of the boxcar and forage for food.  When the train eventually came to a stop, she spent another 13 months in virtual captivity. Several years later, she came to America.  She married a U.S. soldier she met in Germany, and she became a successful real estate broker.  

Theresa is a kind, thoughtful neighbor.  When Kitch was sick, she did everything she could to lift her spirits. Several times her husband Terry brought her trademark homemade Apfel Kuchen to our door. It was more than a delicious dessert; it was a mark of her caring heart.

Parents with Purpose

In our home away from home, North Plainfield, N.J., Chris and Wanda Blue are teaching their three children to believe in their country, and behave in a way that will enable them to take full advantage of the blessings of liberty.

Both Chris and Wanda have high expectations for their son and two daughters. They are active participants in their lives.  They attend school events.  Wanda is a school bus driver and a member of the PTO.  Together they visited Shanksville with us. They attended screenings at the high school, and recently Wanda was a chaperone for our Gettysburg project. The Blues are involved and invested in caring and helpful ways in the lives of their children because they want a better tomorrow for them. The Blues believe in the American dream, and they are doing what it takes to make it happen.

Serendipity

During a visit to the Visitor Center at the Gettysburg National Military Park, I met  Bonnie Orlando. She was volunteering at the Information Desk. I had a question. She had the answer and a business card that introduced me to the wonderful world of living history.

Bonnie and her husband Frank are retired teachers. They decided to spend the Indian summer of their life in Gettysburg helping people of all ages better understand the legacy of General and Mrs. Robert E. Lee. They do it with dignity, class and grace.

They teach lessons of forgiveness and reconciliation.

They give the story of the greatest battle in North America depth and understanding.

They give graciously and generously of their time and talent to anyone who wants to go behind the lines of this horrible conflict into the heart and soul of one of America’s greatest generals, and one of the premier families of the South. 

They teach by example one of the essential characteristics of America at its best.  They give more because they want to be more and do more for the people they serve.

The words Robert E. Lee wrote to his sons apply:

“Be kind, and generous, and pray earnestly to God to enable you to keep His commandments and walk in the same all the days of your life.”

Happy Birthday America.

(To be continued)

Please provide feedback to;

tony.mussari@gmail.com

Happy Birthday America: Part 2

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

The genius of the United States is not best or most in its executives or legislatures, nor in its ambassadors or authors or college presidents, or churches, or parlors, nor even in its newspapers or inventors, but always most in its common people.Sinclair Lewis

Making It Happen

Windsor Park Camp is the best week of the summer for Kitch and me. It is a week of uninterrupted participation in the life of our 10-year-old granddaughter, Julia.

Wherever we go, we go together.  Whatever we do, we do together. Whatever we learn, we learn together.

Without question, the highlight of Windsor Park Camp 2012 was a visit to the Tingley Glass Store and Studio in Dickson City.

Julia is a creative child, and we were looking for an activity that would be challenging, interesting and educational. At Tingly Glass, Julia had an opportunity to create an original glass product under the watchful and talented eye of a skilled professional glass artist.

The environment was welcoming, the employees were engaging, the studio was immaculately kept, and the instruction was up close, personal and very effective.

Tingley Glass is the heart and brain child of Jan Winemiller an accomplished artist and a member of one of the founding families of Harford, Pennsylvania. She has built a reputation for extraordinary work, historical preservation and customer service of an extraordinary kind.
Every person we met during our visit put Julia’s needs first. They went out of their way to make it a memorable and productive experience for her, and they were very kind to Kitch and me.

I marveled at the interpersonal skills of JoAnn Radicchi, a retired special education administrator who coordinated our visit to Tingley Glass.  

Gwyneth Steele, Julia’s teacher, exhibited teaching skills that ranked among the very best I have ever experienced. In a very limited window, she eliminated any apprehensions Julia might have had.  She drew her into the creative process with questions that were easy to understand and answer.  She demonstrated the process, and then she left Julia alone at a work bench to make the most of her opportunity.

While Julia worked on her project, Gwen watched her from across the room. Occasionally she would join Julia to help her learn a technique or refine an aspect of the glass horse she was creating.

Watching them work together was pure poetry in motion.

When it was over I asked Julia what she thought about the experience. One word came spontaneously and enthusiastically to her lips, “awesome.”

That word perfectly describes what Jan Winemiller and her team is accomplishing one customer or student at a time at Tingley Glass.

Even more amazing is the fact that the store in Dixon City has been open for less than a year.  You read it correctly.  This facility was opened during one of the most challenging recessions in recent memory, and the business is thriving.

Kitch and I are not economists, but we have learned something about successful businesses during our Face of America journey. They put their customer’s needs first, second and always before anything else including profit. It’s not exclusively about the bottom line.  It’s about what the customer needs. They are willing to take a reduced profit to establish a long term relationship with a satisfied customer who will leave the store with pleasant memories and a desire to share the good news with others.

That’s exactly what happened to us at Tingley Glass.

It was a quintessential American moment. It was America at its best.  At this place, on a beautiful summer afternoon quality, performance, satisfaction and relationship building left a deep and lasting impression and forged a connection that will take us back to Tingley Glass in Dickson City again and again.

The words of Bob Burg I heard on Marty Wolff’s radio program, The Business Builders Show, say it all:

‘Your truth is how much more you give in value than you take in payment.”

Happy Birthday America

(To be continued)

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Happy Birthday America, Part 3

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

The genius of the United States is not best or most in its executives or legislatures, nor in its ambassadors or authors or college presidents, or churches, or parlors, nor even in its newspapers or inventors, but always most in its common people.Sinclair Lewis

Giving What You’ve Got

During the past few months, Kitch and I have been spending a good deal of time at the Back Mountain Memorial Library. Kitch is a library person by habit and nature.  She has been a reader since her childhood.  It gives her great pleasure, and it fills her mind with beautiful thoughts.

During her battle with breast cancer, she made a bucket list.  Volunteering at our local library was the first item on that list. Once she received the “NED” diagnosis, she signed up to volunteer at the Slightly Read Bookstore. There she works with like-minded people who are determined to do what it takes to help the library maintain its high standard of community service and thrive during these difficult days of digital everything.

A few months ago, I was invited to become a board member. Without hesitation, I accepted.

Both Kitch and I are amazed by the quality of people we meet and the depth of their commitment, dedication and service to the library.

Ruth Tetschner is a retired educator, and library board member.  She came up with the idea for the bookstore in 1998. Her only credentials were intelligence, common sense, a good mind for business, the ability to set a good example and a very engaging way.

Today, she manages the store, and she supervises 32 volunteers who perform all of the necessary services to keep the store running. They are the sales staff, the maintenance staff, and the back-office workers who process the books and stock the shelves.  They do it all without noise or notice, and they have a wonderful time doing what they do. If you were looking for a classic example of community, these men and women perfectly fit that description.

Once a month, 19 members of the board meet with Librarian Martha Butler to discuss everything from finance and investment to policy and library operations.

As one of the three new members of the board, I have a steep learning curve. I spend most of my time listening and observing as the other members of the board share their insights and wisdom. It is a very impressive group of people who reflect the spirit of the Face of America at its best. They are generous with their time, and proactive in all the ways that matter.  Their discussions are civil and very thoughtful.  They are problem solvers, not problem creators. The atmosphere is positive and the outcomes are always productive.

The Auction

Every year the library sponsors an auction to raise money for the operating budget. In years past, Kitch and I always attended the auction, and one year we produced a Windsor Park Story about the event. When I joined the board, I thought I knew something about this event. Was I mistaken!

This is an undertaking like nothing I have ever experienced.  It demands a good deal of work every month of the year, and depends on the hard work and selfless service of an army of volunteers.

Recently I watched these men, women and children in action as they prepared the grounds for this year’s event. It was like watching a concert orchestra brilliantly perform a complicated composition.

Everyone had a job to do, a place to do it, and everyone performed their task flawlessly. As I hurriedly took pictures to capture this beautiful moment, all I could think of was Cleveland Amory’s famous quotation:

“What this world needs is a new kind of Army – The army of the kind.”

If you want to see America at its best, visit the Back Mountain Memorial Library, its Slightly Read Bookstore and its auction. You won’t be disappointed, and you will walk away believing that American treasures are in good hands when volunteers are incorporated into the lifeblood of its institutions.

Happy Birthday America

(To be continued)

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Happy Birthday America, Part 4

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

The genius of the United States is not best or most in its executives or legislatures, nor in its ambassadors or authors or college presidents, or churches, or parlors, nor even in its newspapers or inventors, but always most in its common people.Sinclair Lewis

Doing the Right Thing

There are 90,000 local school board members in America. They govern 13,809 school districts serving 50 million public school students. In my opinion, being an effective school board member is one of the most important, but difficult, jobs in the country. I know whereof I speak. In another lifetime, I served on a board of education for almost ten years.

On June 20, the Board of Education in North Plainfield, New Jersey, held its monthly meeting. One of the agenda items was a report about our Gettysburg project.

Organized by Tom Mazur, the district’s Supervisor for Performing Arts, the board agreed to listen to reports from the students who are involve in the project. They also agreed to permit us to record the reports for possible inclusion in our documentary about their visit to Gettysburg.

Of the ten students who went to Gettysburg, six attended the meeting and one parent. What was intended to be a brief, 10 minute report turned out to be a 40 minute testimonial to the value of experiential learning.

One by one, the students were introduced by Mr. Mazur. Then they calmly took their place in the center of the room, and they spoke with conviction about the things they experienced, the lessons they learned and the ways the trip will impact them for the rest of their life.

Without giving away the substance of what was said (that will be presented in our documentary) I would like to summarize some of the most compelling comments.

Sophomore Adrian Guerrero told the board members he took this opportunity very seriously. For him, it wasn’t a game or just another field trip. It was an opportunity to learn life lessons that will help him for the rest of his life.

Another sophomore Mark Havrilla will join the military after he graduates. He talked convincingly about the examples of service to country he learned at Gettysburg.

Adriana Miranda stood in front of the board with a hand-made sign. The most important words on her sign read “Gettysburg Family.” She wanted the board members to know that ten students went to Gettysburg as individuals. They left the national military park as a family tied together by what they experienced there.

Max Torres is a successful athlete. Next year he will continue his education at Rutgers University. For Max, the Gettysburg experience was an invaluable lesson in American history.

David Havrilla was most impressed with the living history presentations. He will never forget meeting General & Mrs. Robert E. Lee and President Abraham Lincoln.

For Jalynn Rivera, Gettysburg was an experience in growth. development and teamwork that will make her a better person. Jalynn sees the Gettysburg project through the eyes of a poet, and the poem she wrote about her Gettysburg experience touched the hearts of everyone in the room.

When I asked the student representative to the Board of Education what she thought about the reports, Anwar Yamna, a senior who earned a scholarship to attend Harvard University and one of the most respected students in the senior class, answered without equivocation:

“I wish I had been able to go. It sounds like a wonderful, experience.

Watching these students through the viewfinder of my camera and listening to their comments, the words of Horace Mann came to mind:

Education is the great equalizer of the conditions of men, the balance-wheel of the social machinery.

Several members of the Board of Education asked the students wonderful questions that kept the discussion going. The Superintendent of Schools, Dr. Marilyn Birnbaum, was very complimentary in her comments. The Assistant Superintendent, Dr. Robert Rich, did not mince words when he told the students and everyone in the room this is an excellent example of why teaching students to pass standardized exams is not the best measure of learning.

One of the board members, Tom Kasper, was very taken by the breath, depth and scope of the student reports. For him and the other members of the board, it was an unique moment of affirmation that their long hours of service are not in vain. It put the emphasis on learning where it should be, the students and their needs.

In that board room in North Plainfield, on that night, I saw a wonderful collage of the Face of America on its best day. The people assembled in the room provided a portrait of America’s tomorrow today. The ideas expressed and the transformations recorded by the students themselves made it crystal clear why America’s future will be shaped in the classrooms of today.

On this, America’s birthday, It would be wise for all of us to remember the prophetic words of Senator Claiborne Pell:

The strength of the United States is not in the gold at Fort Knox or the weapons of mass destruction that we have, but the sum total of the education and the character of our people.

Happy Birthday America

(To be continued)

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Happy Birthday America, Part 5

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com
All Rights Reserved

The genius of the United States is not best or most in its executives or legislatures, nor in its ambassadors or authors or college presidents, or churches, or parlors, nor even in its newspapers or inventors, but always most in its common people.Sinclair Lewis

Taking Care of Our Stitch

Several weeks ago our friend, Paul Swenson, sent us information about Tide’s U.S Flag Tribute in honor of the 2012 Summer Olympic Games.

The executives of the familiar Procter and Gamble product urged people all over America to answer the question: “What Does The Red, White and Blue Mean to You?”

The answers would be reviewed and more than one thousand of these tributes, comments, names and photos would be selected and "quilted" into a massive 80 foot by 160 foot U.S. flag design and put on display July 2nd and 3rd at Bryant Park, one block away from Times Square in New York City.

Paul’s company, Colonial Flag, was contracted to handle all of the details of this massive undertaking. Paul earned a sterling reputation for the work he and his employees did to place Healing Field flag displays all over the country during the years following September 11, 2001.  

Paul Swenson is a big man with a kind and loving heart of gold. Because we admire Paul and his work, Kitch and I posted this tribute to Emily Perez, the inspiration for our Face of America Project:

When we think of the Red, White & Blue, we think of 2d LT. Emily Perez.

Emily was a member of West Point’s “9/11 Class." She was the highest ranking Black/Hispanic graduate in the school’s history, and the first female officer from West Point to die in Iraq.

2d Lt. Emily Perez is a member of the New Greatest Generation and a radiant Face of America on its best day.

2d Lt. Emily Perez is what the Red, White & Blue is all about; courage, compassion, equality, freedom, justice, opportunity, service to country and service to others.

God Bless Emily, and God Bless America.

Almost three months flew by, and the week before the Tide Flag was to be presented, I wrote a note of encouragement to Paul:

Hi Paul:

I have been thinking about you and your big event in New York next week.

Please know that Kitch and I wish you the very best.

I may try to visit on July 3.

We are hosting our 10-year-old granddaughter, Julia, for Windsor Park Camp this week, and that involves quite a bit of driving.  If the body is able, I will get to New York to celebrate your great accomplishment.  If it is not, my spirit will celebrate it in our Angel Garden in Windsor Park. Here we celebrate the heroic deeds of the passengers and crew of Flight 93 every day of the year, and the inspiration for our Face ofAmerica project, Emily Perez.

Attached is a picture of Julia building an enclave garden in the Angel Garden next to the tribute to Emily Perez.

The picture of the woman with the Tide shirt is almost providential. In this Windsor Park Camp, we are trying to teach Julia, by example, the power of kindness and gratitude.

This woman works with Kitch as a volunteer at our local library.  Her husband and I are library board members. He made an unannounced visit to our home the day Julia and I were building the enclave garden. He was so taken by what he experienced; he and his wife bought Julia a surprise gift.  This act of kindness reinforced what we are trying to teach her.  It enabled us to stress the importance of saying thank you. 
To do this, we cut the most beautiful flower in our garden, and we went to their home unannounced, and Julia gave her the flower and a handwritten thank you note.

When the door opened and I saw the Tide shirt, I thought of you and your healing project.

Good luck and God’s speed dear friend.

On July 3d, shortly after 1 p.m., I received this note with a picture:

Your stitch my friends

Love
Paul

I get a lump in my throat every time I read those four words. It is something we hoped for, but never expected to happen especially on this day when most of the news we received was negative.

I immediately wrote a note to Emily’s parents.  It was the best part of the process:

Dear Vicki & Daniel:

I just received word that our tribute to Emily was included in the huge American flag that answers the Question: “What Does the Red, White and Blue mean to you?”

The flag is being put in place today. It will be celebrated in a special way tomorrow in the park at 42d Street.

Kitch and I are humbled by this honor for Emily, and we wanted you to be the first to know.

Attached you will find two pictures of Emily’s Stitch on the flag.  They document this wonderful tribute to your beautiful daughter and our inspiration for our Face of America project and journey.

With admiration, respect and friendship,

Tony & Kitch

Emily’s mother responded with these beautiful words:

Dear Kitch and Tony,

Just returning from a church mission trip to Sierra Leone.  Trips like this reinforce our love and pride in being an American.

Thank you once again for keeping Emily’s memory alive.  Prayerfully, she will continue to be an inspiration to the New Generation.

Warmest Regards,

Vicki & Daniel

In case you are wondering what this has to do with America’s birthday and our face of America project, Paul Swenson provided the answer when he sent this note to us today:

I calculate that there is roughly one stitch for every American in this size of flag.  All connected in a common purpose regardless of position or color. The question I ask myself is how well am I taking care of my stitch?

Makes this saying all the more pertinent, "Your task to build a better world,” God said, I answered, “ How? The world is such a large vast place, so complicated now, and I so small and helpless am, there’s nothing I can do.” But God, in all His wisdom said, "Just build a better you".

Today Americans celebrate our national birthday with parades, fireworks, family reunions, and backyard barbeques.

Kitch and celebrated this day by exercising our right of free speech.

I have been writing about people, places and events that, in my opinion, speak to Americans at their very best, the higher angels as it were of caring, compassion, connection, courage, equality, freedom, justice, opportunity, service to country and service to others.

Kitch has been working in the garden, reading and editing these five articles and baking bread for one of the stands at the Back Mountain Memorial Library Auction.

In simple terms, we are taking care of our stitch. We are learning, growing and experiencing the blessings of liberty that make us free.

We are saying living prayers for our family, our friends and our country.

We are doing what we love to do in a country with limitless opportunities.

We are saying Happy Birthday America, while privately we pray these three words, God Bless America.

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Father’s Day 2012, A Man for All Seasons

Written by Tony Mussari
Edited by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012
All rights reserved
Mussari-Loftus Associates
The Face of America Project
faceofamericawps.com

He didn’t tell me how to live; he lived and let me watch him do it. Clarence Budington Kelland

A Father’s Gifts

Most of what I know about being a father and a grandfather, I learned by watching my dad. He was a happy man, a thoughtful man, an industrious man, a loving man, an honorable man, and a generous man.

When he was just a boy, he learned how tough the world can be. He was a breaker boy. For those who do not know the term, breaker boys sat on coal shoots and they separated coal from other rocks and minerals. It was a tortuous job. If they made a mistake or they gave in to childhood distractions, a stick man would hit them with his stick, and he would abuse them with obscene words of condemnation.

Breaker boys worked 8 to 10 hours a day six days a week. The work was dangerous. They were not permitted to wear gloves. At the end of the day their hands and fingers were cut and bleeding. My father was one of the fortunate ones. He did not lose a finger or a hand to the machinery in the breaker. He was not pulled into the rushing coal and crushed to death. He did not get asthma or black lung disease from the coal dust in the breaker.

My father graduated from the breaker to a job that paid him to drive new cars from Detroit to car dealers in Lackawanna County. He earned his advanced degree when he was hired by the Delaware and Hudson Railroad. A work related accident put him and his broken leg in a room in Mercy Hospital. There, he met a young student nurse. They enjoyed one another’s company. They dated, and eventually they married. That partnership gave my father the opportunity to work overtime and literally sacrifice everything to raise three children.

My dad was a good spirited man. I never heard him complain about anything except my childhood indiscretions like getting out of my seat and walking up the aisle during mass, my tendency to play with matches, and my unsuccessful attempting to push a spool of wire rope at the loading dock of the Hazard Company on my way home from school. This adventure ended when I was pinned beneath the spool of wire rope. There are other examples, but I think you get then point. My brother and sister were no match for my ability to get into trouble.

Every morning at 5 a.m., the smell of freshly brewed Eight O’clock Coffee filled our home. Prepared by my mother for my dad’s breakfast and the thermos bottle in his lunch pail, it was one of my dad’s greatest pleasures in life, that and my mother’s home-made apple pie.

My father idolized my mother, and he had a very special place in his heart for my sister. Watching him interact with them, I learned to respect women. One of the cardinal rules in our home, Ken and I never hit, or shoved my mother or my sister. We were not permitted to use abusive or obscene language in their presence.

Another cardinal rule involved responsibility. My father worked on the railroad by day, and he was on call for emergencies at night. If a signal or other device did not work, he got the call. The overtime he earned from these jobs was saved and used to pay for our education. Like so many fathers of his generation, he went without so that his children could get the best education available.

Watching him work at school activities, I learned the importance of volunteering. He collected tickets at our basketball games. He painted the rooms at the CYC. He was a member of the Holy Name Society. He volunteered to umpire our pick up baseball games. Going with him to vote on election day, I learned the obligations of citizenship.

My dad was a certified sweet tooth. He loved to surprise us with Dixi Cup ice cream. The three ounce cups of vanilla or chocolate ice cream or a mix of the two and the small wooden spoons were part of the culture of our childhood.

My father was a genuine Mr-Fix-It. He could fix almost anything, and he loved to tinker with broken appliances and radios.

When his grandchildren came to visit, he had a magical presence.

When I look back at my childhood years and the legacy of my father, these are the most lasting lessons he taught me, not with words, but with quiet deeds:

1. The power of kindness;

2. The gift of responsibility;

3. The beauty of self sacrifice;

4. The meaning of love;

5. The emancipation of honesty;

6. The benefit of hard work;

7. The joy of laughter;

8. The importance of innocence;

9. The warmth of humility;

10. The importance of education.

The most memorable moment I had with my father, happened in September 1967. He and my mother came to visit me in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. It was the longest trip they took during their married life. I had just passed one of the candidacy exams required for my Ph.D. After a visit to the University of Iowa in Iowa City, my father said these words to my mother:

“Jane, you know I never went to high school, but with Ken and Tony, I believe I have a college degree.”

In less than a month after that wonderful visit, my father died from the cancer he most likely got from the PCB’s in the railroad yards where he worked. He was 62 years old.

The most beautiful tribute to my dad came from the heart of one of my former teachers. “The saddest thing about your father’s death is the loss of his beautiful smile.”

I see that smile every day. It is recorded in a picture I took of my father while I was in college and living at home.

When I visit my father’s grave, the small, unpretentious tombstone doesn’t say hero. It doesn’t say successful. It doesn’t say prominent. It simply says Mussari. Many years ago a scholar told me that my dad’s family name in Italy was most likely Mussar, and it means loving kindness.

That is the who, what, when where and why of my father and his life. It is the standard he set for his three children, and it is his legacy to his children and grandchildren.

There are fathers like my dad all over the country. Kitch and I were privileged to meet some of them during our Face of America journey and during our years in the classroom. On this Father’s Day, I will be thinking about my father and giving thanks for all that he did for me to honor you.

William Wordsworth said what I am feeling with these ten words:

Father! – to God himself we cannot give a holier name.

Thank you dad

Happy Father’s Day

(Pictures of breaker boys, Library of Congress digital collection)

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com

Life is for the Living

Written by Tony Mussari
Photographs by Kitch Loftus-Mussari
Copyright 2012, Mussari-Loftus Associates, LTD
All Rights Reserved

I’ve got nothing to do today but smile. Simon & Garfunkel

One of the goals of our Face of America project was to demonstrate that one can live a full life after open heart surgery.

Five years ago this day, Operating Room 4 at Wilkes-Barre General Hospital was my home. The fact that I am writing this note indicates that Dr. Michael Harostock and the members of the surgical team who helped him performed my quadruple bypass surgery did a good job.

During the past five years, I tried to make the most of the opportunities I had to help others and serve my community.  I tried to be a good friend to those who sought my friendship. I tried to produce television programs and tell stories that would help people find examples of hope, inspiration and service. I made a commitment to do at least one kind act every day. I worked in quiet ways to refine the gifts of forgiveness, tolerance and understanding. I realized a childhood dream to travel the highways of our country searching for the greatness of America. I tried to be a good steward of Windsor Park.

Most important, every day I try to be a good husband to Kitch, father to my children and grandfather to Julia and P.J.

On the good days when I am successful, I feel a peaceful kind of joy. On the bad days when I don’t quite measure up to the standard, I remind myself that I can and must do better. Every day, I learn something that helps me to grow in ways that would make my parents proud. I gain strength and comfort from the words of George Bernard Shaw:

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

The Blessings of a Second Chance at Life

For the past five years, I have enjoyed the blessings of a second chance at life. For that I am more thankful than any words can express.

In 2007, my near death experience taught me some invaluable things about life.

Life is what you make it, not what others give you.  Make it a good experience. The words of Ralph Waldo Emerson apply:

Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.

Life is not always kind. There are many disappointments, but disappointment is the mother of opportunity. Margret Mitchell’s words are prophetic:

Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.

Life is about humility. Not the humility of the saints, but the humility of the heart makes you realize that you are not the center of the universe. To paraphrase the words of Khaled Hosseini:

It is better to be hurt by the truth than comforted with a lie.

Life is short, and it is about slow progress:

Life is to be lived, not controlled; and humanity is won by continuing to play in face of certain defeat. Ralph Ellison

We have to be content with slow progress. Fr. Joe Grizone

Life is about giving, not taking. Give generously and thoughtfully of your time and your talents when you can. One of our greatest minds gave truth to these words:

Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile. Albert Einstein

Life is about looking forward. Don’t look back with regret. Move forward with resolve.

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride! Hunter S. Thompson

A meaningful life is about caring in genuine ways about family, friends and country. Emily Dickinson’s advice always wins the day:

If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain.

Life is for the living. Live it fully, because you may not get a second chance:

Remember, remember, this is now, and now, and now. Live it, feel it, cling to it. I want to become acutely aware of all I’ve taken for granted. Sylvia Plath

Life is a monument to friendship. Without friendships deeply rooted in caring, gratitude,loyalty and sharing, life is empty:

Friendship marks a life even more deeply than love. Love risks degenerating into obsession, friendship is never anything but sharing. Elie Wiesel

Life is about courage translated into daily practice.  Do the right thing for the right reason:

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. Anais Nin

Life is about disappointment, discouragement and despair. Don’t Give Up!

When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way. Paulo Coelho

I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today life goes on, and it will be better tomorrow. Maya Angelou

The words of Langston Hughes summarize the most important lesson I learned on June 12, 2007:

Life is for the living.
Death is for the dead.
Let life be like music.
And death a note unsaid.
Langston Hughes

Please provide feedback to:
tony.mussari@gmail.com